No one is a buffet

A LIST OF EVERYBODY’S RIGHTS

Trigger warning: This post (and the comments) are partly about consent and might be upsetting for people with a history of abuse.

Here is a list of things that everyone deserves and has a right to. This world can be pretty mean sometimes and you might forget that you actually deserve to be treated nicely. If you want, you can put this list next to your bed, so you wont forget.

There is enough of everything. For everyone.

§ 1. Everyone deserves a happy and safe life.

§ 2. Everyone deserves to be loved.

§ 3. Everybody has the right to have sex. Everybody has the right to have the kind of sex they want (see § 4 though).

§ 4. Everybody has the right to say no to sex. Anytime, no matter what. Everybody has the right to say ‘yes’ to certain forms of sex and ‘no’ to others. And say ‘yes’ to one person and ‘no’ to another.

§ 5. Everybody has the right to have their boundaries respected.

§ 6. Everybody has the right to be and do what they want as long as it doesn’t limit the possibility of others to be or do what they want.

§ 7. No one needs to change themselves to make others happy.

§ 8. You have the right to ask anyone you want out on a date.

§ 9. You have the right to reject who you want, when you want, and where you want without feeling bad, without having to explain yourself or apologize.

§ 10. Everybody has the right to refuse to participate in things, even if people they care about want them to join.

§ 11. Everybody has the right to suggest activities.

§ 12. Everybody has the right to all kinds of feelings, to their own feelings and to be in different moods on different days, in different places and with different people.

§ 13. Everybody has the right to ask for tenderness, closeness, to be cuddled and held. Everybody has the right to ask for a hug.

§ 14. Everybody has the right to reject having sex with someone, even if they just gave you expensive presents or a dinner, even if you’re in a relationship or just made up after a fight or what.

§ 15. Everybody has the right to be taken seriously and ask people not to interrupt them when they talk.

§ 16. Everybody has the right to start a new relationship slowly and say they want to get to know the person better, before moving on.

§ 17. Everybody has the right to live without unwanted touch, looks and comments. Anywhere, anytime and no matter how they look, dress or act.

§ 18. Everybody has the right to act in one way with one person and a different way with a different person.

§ 19. You have the right to change your mind whenever you want.

You can write more rights in the comment field underneath.

(This list is inspired by Learning Good Consent, a zine about consent. You can download it for free here – along with lots of other good zines. Read it. It’s really good. The photo is from this fine blog)